LIMBO

[niceguyferatu]

this came up when i googled clown shitpost

Comments

[niceguyferatu]

Really now! Then surely you can spare a fellow a moment for a chat.

[ SPEEDWALKS EVEN FASTER IN GUCCI SHOES

DOES GUCCI MAKE SHOES?

I'M SURE THEY'RE EASIER TO SPEEDWALK IN THAN CLOWN SHOES ]

[commedia]

Can you leave me alone-

[And as soon as Douman turns, it starts.]

[There is a man kneeling in the middle of a room in the night. The man is Ashiya Douman. They stare at the wall across from them, with wide, weary eyes, their body tensed, like expecting a threat.]

[A person steps out of the shadows, bending down to embrace them, clawed fingernails digging deep into their shoulder.]

[The person in question is Ashiya Douman.]

[And Douman bends in to whisper something into the first Douman's ear. A single hissed sentence, a simple statement, said as fact.]

[If things remain as they are, you'll never once surpass Seimei.]

[And instantly, the rush of emotions comes. Sorrow. Terror. Fear. Anger. Hatred. Jealousy. Unbelievable despair. It comes like a roaring tide, and the first Douman starts to weep, and weep and weep, and howl like the world itself is ending, and things start to crash together in static, and it is impossible to tell where one Ashiya Douman begins and the other ends and-]

[And suddenly, where there were two, there is just one. Ashiya Douman, kneeling quietly in the middle of a moonlit room.]

[Just smiling to themselves. Their eyes open, dark.]

[Comfortable.]

[Douman throws himself back with a snarl, obviously displeased.]

[niceguyferatu]

[ It's not just the memory itself that has Vlad blinking in shock, but Douman's unusually hostile reaction to it afterwards as well. ]

...My. What was that?

[commedia]

...

[Douman stops and just...stares. The hostility just melts away into something placid.]

...Well, you wouldn't understand, anyways.

[niceguyferatu]

Really, Douman? Do you think me so stupid?

[commedia]

Ahaha.

[A cold, harsh laugh.]

Tell me then, o wise one! Tell me what it means, hm?

[niceguyferatu]

Well, this hardly seems fair, considering I barely understand how things work in your world, but very well.

It almost looked like a possession, of sorts. The first you was obviously in distress and struggling with something, and the other...well, clearly said something deeply upsetting. But in the end, the second possesses the first and subsumes their distress, replacing it with the second's much calmer demeanor.

...that, or it was some form of metaphorical dreamscape rather than a direct memory.

[commedia]

Ahahaha.

[There is no confirmation or denial. Just simply a cold laugh, and a grin that curves up like a crescent moon.]

[Douman splays a hand over their own chest.]

Do you think me possessed, Vlad? Do you think I am one of your ghosts to study?

[niceguyferatu]

One of the first things you told me was that you were, essentially, a ghost. That in itself is not surprising. And honestly, I do less studying of ghosts and more collaborating with them.

[commedia]

Hmm. Does that mean you would want to collaborate with a humble priest like myself? I am not exactly a ghost, you know.

[niceguyferatu]

What you are or are not matters less to me than what you can do. That is what decides who I collaborate with--nothing more, nothing less.

[commedia]

Mmm, and what are you looking for, Vlad?

Let me guess...power?

[niceguyferatu]

Love.

[commedia]

...

Excuse me?

[niceguyferatu]

Everything I do, everything I have ever done, has always been in pursuit of love.

[commedia]

[They stare at him a little awkwardly.]

Love in general? Or love of someone in particular?

[niceguyferatu]

[ Vlad sees that awkward look and is a little annoyed by it. What, surely this isn't so bizarre? ]

Someone in particu--

[ Before he can even finish saying it, though, they get tossed into another memory! (5:24 - 6:08)

As the portal powers up, filling the lab with a sickening green glow and a crackling whine, Vlad finds himself utterly transfixed. He can't move, he can do nothing but gape at the incredible power that they've tapped into.

Did they really do it? Were their calculations right after all? It's--amazing, awe-inspiring, terrible--

And then it shoots an enormous beam of energy straight into Vlad's face. Terrible, indeed. The pain utterly wracks him, he can do nothing but scream until the beam subsides and even without seeing it, he can tell from the unimaginable burning sting that something is horribly wrong.

His face is absolutely covered in nasty pimples and boils, shiny and red and full of glowing pus. His hair is already streaked through with white, and it will only get worse with time.

His friends, partners, confidantes--and Maddie, the love of his life--stare at him and gasp in utter horror, clinging to each other for dear life and staring at him like he's some kind of abomination.

After whatever that energy did to him, maybe he is now. ]

[commedia]

...

[Wow, that's some nasty acne disease, bro.]

[Douman blinks and somehow, the awkwardness goes away? How odd. They just smile lightly. Now they see. Now they understand. So Vlad was doing it out of love...?]

You look alright, now. Perhaps this is the time to gain the love of your life's attention back, hm?

[niceguyferatu]

[ Wow! It sure sucks when it's your tragic mysterious backstory getting spilled, huh!!! ]

I've been trying. For well over a year now, I've been trying.

But even though I did eventually recover, it took years, and the world carries on regardless--people move on, graduate...get married.

[commedia]

...Ah. She is taken by another.

[Now THAT is a twist. Douman grins.]

And what are you here for, then? To wish for a world where she married you instead?

[niceguyferatu]

If that's what it takes, then yes. Anything that will allow me to right this cosmic wrong and redeem the lost years of my life.

[ douman's smile rankles him, just a bit--he feels like he's being mocked. ]

[commedia]

Ah, but you wouldn't be the man you are, today. Are you ready to throw all those years of collaboration with ghosts and the like away for this? What a determined man you are.

[niceguyferatu]

The man I am today is a compromise. I only ever worked with ghosts so extensively in pursuit of what I lost that day.

[ That includes both his lost love as well as the best version of himself, because if he'd spent the last 20 years of his life with Maddie, he's sure he would've become a better person.

(he is wrong about this. but he's not self-aware enough to realize it.) ]

[commedia]

[A tilt of the head.]

Speaking of ghosts....what was that machine? A "portal"? Is that what got you started in your path?

[niceguyferatu]

Yes...the very first of its kind. Its activation changed every aspect of my life from that point on.

But enough about me. You asked me what I thought of your recollection earlier. I'm interested to know how close my guess was--or wasn't.