MURDERDATE

[niceguyferatu]

Comments

[niceguyferatu]

[ ...yeah, sure, why the fuck not. Floor furbies. Flurbies. And they eat your hands now! FINE.

I mean, not fine, but Vlad is less concerned about Fukuda's hand right now and more concerned about his death. ]

Why on Earth would you kill me?! I thought we were getting along just fine!

[brightred]

You're much more impressive with holes. [There, there, Fukuda. It's fine. We'll find someone for you to drill later.]

And really, Vlad, consider yourself lucky. It's not every day a famous serial killer takes the time to finish~ you~ off~

[holeful]

[Fukuda is confused for a moment until he realized Grell means him?? He doesn't think he's that famous. He wants to discuss more about his hand situation but it seems like we have to talk about Vlad first, so;]

I mean, it was your idea, Mr. Vlad? That's why we had to figure out how to do it quickly and painlessly.
[Will Vlad remember his murderdate advice.]

[niceguyferatu]

[ ....oh.

Oh.

He sees what this is now. Fukuda and Grell, teaming up for murders just like he suggested. Huh.

....but still-- ]

I didn't mean you should do it to me!

[brightred]

You need to be more explicit, sir. [Grell is mostly slightly amused at Vlad's complaining.]

If you don't want to be murdered, you shouldn't suggest a method of indiscriminate murder to someone~

[holeful]

Well, you said if it was quick and painless then no one could really be mad about it? So I don't know why you're mad....
[Frankly Vlad should have seen this coming.]

It was actually pretty hard trying to figure out how to do it like that, you know. Grell didn't even want to bother.
[Gesticulating vaguely with what is now definitely a completely healed over hand stump. Where's his fucking hand.]

[niceguyferatu]

I'm mad because I thought you were the only person in this godforsaken afterlife who wouldn't kill me!

[ fuck your hand stump, vlad is busy with THE BETRAYAL ]

[brightred]

Oh, the tragedy of betrayal! [Grell says, dramatically.

and then---]

Did that thing actually eat your hand?

[holeful]

I think so? It hasn't grown back. It healed over instead...
[Sorry Vlad your feelings of betrayal will have to wait because Fukuda is relieved we are finally talking about his missing fucking hand.

But also he is worried because. of his missing fucking hand.]

[niceguyferatu]

Yes, well, maybe the universe saw fit to finally punish someone for killing me!

[brightred]

Ah, perhaps I should test it out and see. [Grell says, and oh she's annoyed, and possessive over Fukuda, and it would probably be a good idea to stop her before she gets up out of Fukuda's lap.]

[holeful]

[Fukuda puts his one remaining hand on her thigh. He is very happy about her getting possessive over him, but please do not kill Vlad again.]

I'm sorry, Mr Vlad. I didn't think you'd be mad about it after what you said? I wasn't trying to hurt your feelings.
[And Vlad will feel that he genuinely means this.]

[niceguyferatu]

[ The sincerity means little to him, because Fukuda will get a dose of Vlad's own emotions over this--betrayal, and a sense of trust destroyed in the process. ]

Yes, well, you did a lot more than hurt my feelings, didn't you?

[ He cracks his neck with a grimace as it continues to heal up. ]

[brightred]

[... oh that hand to stop her is nice. There are some vague warm (and.... attracted) feelings towards Fukuda. Vlad can deal with his own drama Grell is being romanced.]

[holeful]

[Oh... Fukugrell romance feelings feedback loop. He squeezes her leg lightly. I cannot believe how smitten these serial killers are.]

I tried not to? But... maybe there's something I can do to make it up to you?

[niceguyferatu]

Hmm. Perhaps there is.

[ Some way for Fukuda to show him that he doesn't view Vlad as just another punching bag like everyone else here. He takes the opportunity to mull over what exactly that would be. Hmmm...

...Jesus Christ, these serial killers and their TENDER TOUCHING and their ROMANTIC FEELINGS that they're just radiating at him--

Ah. ]

...alright. I've decided on my terms.

I demand to participate in this little relationship you two have. And you will invite me on the next one of these...murder dates. Not to participate, just to spectate.

[brightred]

... excuse me? [oh good feelings are gone and Grell is just offended.]

Sir, you are being far too forward!

[holeful]

[Even Fukuda is a little offended because wow he doesn't want to share???]

No offense Mr Vlad but I'm not really interested in dating you...
[That's what he means by relationship, right?]

[niceguyferatu]

What? No, not dating!

I am only interested in one person romantically, and I have no intentions of cheating on her.

I meant more....carnally.

[ i want you all to know that that word came to me unbidden like a curse and i have not been able to stop wailing in despair about it since ]

[brightred]

......... [Grell is not attracted.]

Only if you get on your knees and beg me to fuck you.

[holeful]

[I hate that Vlad's horrendous word choice has absolutely no negative effect on Fukuda. He seems relieved?]

Oh, Mr Vlad's pretty good actually, Grell. He's pretty rough.
[Now Grell has to deal with the knowledge that Fukuda has fucked this man.]

[niceguyferatu]

Excuse me? Vlad Masters does not beg!

[ He's radiating indignation, shock, offendedness, and...oh? what's that? just the tiniest--the ever so slightest sliver--a teensy hint of...could it be....? arousal? ]

Those are my terms, Fukuda. Either you meet them, or I am through with you. You'll be nothing more than just another murderous enemy out to get me.

[brightred]

Oh? I think you do~ Or do you want me to make you? [And there's the start of arousal from Grell, stronger than most of the other emotions she feels.]

[holeful]

.... Could you maybe beg just a little bit for Grell's sake? Just a tiny bit.
[HE DOES NOT WANT TO BE ENEMIES.

He's glad you're both horny but he needs everyone to come to some sort of verbal agreement.]

[niceguyferatu]

If she wants me to beg, then she will have to make me.